Songs to soothe
Nickie Aven has spent more than two decades supporting people who are grieving or nearing the end of life. With a background as a spiritual counsellor, Nickie has been a spiritual care volunteer at Rowcroft since March 2023. Through the Threshold Choir she founded in South Devon, she now brings gentle, soothing song to patients and their loved ones at Rowcroft, offering comfort and solace at the end of life.
Singing for people at the start and end of life
“I started singing with the first threshold choir in the UK when it was founded in Scotland in 2013,” says Nickie. “After leaving Scotland the following year, I settled in Devon and set up my own choir in 2018. We call ourselves ‘The Moorheart Threshold Singers’ and we sing for people who are on the threshold of life and death.”
‘Kindness made audible’
“The songs we sing are like lullabies. We do not sing songs which are in the public domain, as they could bring up memories, associations and personal stories. The words are simple and the harmonies are sweet, created to offer the receiver a sense of being held and cared for – comforted, like a child being sung to. The tagline for the choir is ‘kindness made audible’ and that is what we endeavour to bring.”
Not performing, but holding space
“We would like people to understand that we are not performing. We sing softly, and often without words at all, so that the sound alone is soothing. We aim to encourage people to release control and relax into the sweetness of the singing. We often see people fall asleep, find some relief from pain, weep, relax their breathing, and become calmer and more peaceful.”
Finding peace through gentle song
“We sing at Rowcroft monthly, and usually just two or three of us attend. I lead the choir as part of what I offer to those who are on the threshold of life. People can request us to sing for their loved ones at the bedside in hospices, residential, or private homes. Sometimes we sing at funerals and memorial services, where there may be up to ten of us singing.”
Facing mortality to support others
“At our choir practices, we don’t just learn songs, we also spend time reflecting on our own mortality, because if we are going to be with people who are dying, we need to be able to face our own death. For me, this isn’t morbid. Acknowledging that death is inevitable sharpens my appreciation for life.
“Working in this field feels like my calling. I love doing whatever I can to bring comfort and solace, and singing is a beautiful way to do that.”
Spiritual care at Rowcroft
At Rowcroft, we are proud to care for people of all faiths and none, offering person-centred care that respects each person’s individual beliefs and ways of finding peace. Whether people find strength and comfort in their relationships, inner resources, prayer, or the calm of our Sanctuary, we’re here to support everyone. You can learn more about spiritual care at Rowcroft here: Spiritual Care | Rowcroft Hospice.
Learn more about Nickie and the Threshold Choir
If you’d like to learn more about the Moorheart Threshold Choir and the gentle care they offer, you can visit their website here. Nickie has also shared her experience of singing at life’s thresholds in a moving article and short documentary for The Guardian, sharing more about how song can help those at the end of life.